Now that Christmas has been saved thanks to the election of Donald Trump, the annual Right Wing Watch War on Christmas gift guide will help you find last-minute gifts for your friends and loved ones celebrating Trump’s rescue of this endangered holiday.
1. Christmas In The End Times
Right-wing televangelist Jim Bakker warned that this year would be the last time Americans could celebrate Christmas if Trump lost the election. But since Trump won, people can rejoice in the fact that the plan to ban Christmas has been thwarted.
Of course, this message doesn’t mesh well with Bakker’s business of selling survivalist products, so Bakker has tweaked his message to say that Trump will indeed usher in the End Times—but in a good way!
And what better way to celebrate Christmas during the End Times than with Bakker’s “Christmas Variety Bucket,” which includes survival food items with a “20-year shelf life,” including buttermilk pancakes, fettuccine alfredo and creamy stroganoff. All of these can be conveniently scooped out with the included "tri-fold shovel.”
In addition, “each bucket features a Christmas ribbon and is shipped in a white box with a red Christmas ribbon printed on the outside, ready for gift giving.”
The Christmas bucket doesn’t include Bakker’s 20-year shelf life pizza, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
2. Merry Trumpmas
Trump tried to get his supporters into the Christmas spirit during his multistate victory tour, even speaking in Mobile, Alabama, in front of a cedar tree that was cut down from a public park solely so it could be used at his rally.
With Christmas becoming part of the Trump brand, it is only fitting that the president-elect’s campaign has released a “Make America Great Again Red Cap Collectible Ornament.”
For the reasonable price of $99, you too can remember what Christmas is all about: Trump!
3. A Very Todd Starnes Christmas
Professional obnoxious person Todd Starnes will be hosting his own Christmas special on FoxNews.com, where he will likely promote his new book, “The Deplorables’ Guide to Making America Great Again,” which is “packed with Todd's signature wit, soul-stirring stories, and practical ways you can fight to restore traditional American values.”
If “Deplorables” is anything like Starnes’ other books, it will surely provide a lot of accurate information and will definitely not become the object of widespread mockery.
But whatever you do, don’t thank him by saying “Happy Holidays.”
4. ‘The Demons of Barack H. Obama’
Last week, Colorado state Rep. Gordon Klingenschmitt emailed members of his Pray In Jesus Name Project a promotion for his hit book, “The Demons of Barack H. Obama,” letting them know that it makes a perfect present:
Gordon James Klingenschmitt’s book, The Demons of Barack H. Obama, explains this truth in a practical, yet Biblical manner. By objectively observing the moral fruit and character of human actors, we can see how God (or the devil) uses people to build their moral (or immoral) kingdoms in our midst; particularly in the field of American politics.
As yet another presidential term comes to an end, consider this book a memento and the perfect holiday gift for those interested in knowing the truth!
We read the book back in 2014, and can attest that readers will learn all about Obama’s dozens of demonic spirits, which, according to Klingenschmitt, include the spirits of “death,” “murder,” “child-murder,” “sexual abuse,” “genocide,” “paganism,” “witchcraft,” “homosexual lust” and “anti-Christian oppression.”
5. AmeriGeddon
The film “AmeriGeddon” makes a perfect gift for the movie buffs in your life who want to fight the “biased liberal media” and the “demonic elite establishment.”
With a cast that includes far-right radio host Alex Jones and Mike Norris, son of Chuck Norris, “AmeriGeddon” tells the tale of a plot by terrorists, the U.S. president and the United Nations to launch a nuclear electromagnetic pulse attack on the U.S. The president then uses the attack to justify the institution of martial law, the confiscation of firearms and the advancement of the plans of the globalist New World Order.
The movie’s star and producer, Gary Heavin, is the founder of Curves gym and a 9/11 truther.
There was even real-life intrigue involved in the making of the film: Norris claims he was “poisoned by a mysterious man” following a showing.
We think that after watching the trailer, you will agree that this movie is going to be a cult classic.
